Monthly Archives: January 2011


[Kauser Franz Joseph und Elisabeth Wiener Porzelan]

Using verbal speech is not the only way that some people in love communicate with each other; the point is, and the importance is, that they do.

How else would they keep their love alive if they kept themselves in solitude?

People notice, and sometimes they want what they are seeing in others.

“Somehow he felt unable to be indignant or protest, although some sort of joke had certainly been played upon him. There was nothing remote or mysterious here–only something private. The only secret was the ancient communication between two people. But the memory of the woman’s waiting silently by the cold hearth, of the man’s stubborn journey a mile away to get fire, and how they finally brought out their food and drink and filled the room proudly with all they had to show, was suddenly too clear and too enormous within him for response . . . .” from Death of a Traveling Salesman by Eudora Welty

Can love survive and thrive without communication?


Persona non grata

“Some cause happiness WHEREVER they go, others WHENEVER they go.” Oscar Wilde

What to do, how to feel when you cannot stand the sight of a certain person? When his or her presence makes you feel uncomfortable; when you do not want them around for whatever reason (some trivial and some serious)?

And what would you do or how would you feel if others did not want you around?

In both cases, I am not talking about strangers, but family and friends. People that I guess  should want you to be there, should want you to exist in their presence.

But life takes an ugly turn sometimes, and those that some thought loved them, seemed to hate them. The sign now says, “Unwelcome.”

Should finding new friends be an option? Creating new “family members”? Trying to figure out and solving the reason(s) behind being left out?

No one wants to feel unwelcome . . . right?

Putting Two Letters Together

I and F equal If, a powerful word when the letters are combine.

It contains possibilities that good and bad things might happen. It contains hopes, fears, and regrets. It contains the actions of people, whether negative or positive.

If only . . ./If I was . . ./If that did not . . ./If that happens then . . ./ If she or If he . . .

But the if I want to talk about is a poem I read a few years ago, a poem by Rudyard Kipling. It goes:-

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream – and not make dreams your master;
If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build’em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings – nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And – which is more – you’ll be a Man, my son!

What does your IF contains?

Not unhappiness?

I turned on the radio on Friday (remember those things) and the DJ started to introduce a song. I have heard this song many times before, and yes, while listening to it again, I agreed with what was being sung.

“I won’t be a fool, a fool for love, ‘Cause I know I’d rather be alone than be unhappy.” from I’d Rather Be Alone by Karyn White

How many people are in relationships and are very unhappy? How many stay because they think that they are in love, but instead of bliss, they get sadness and pain.

Let us not be naive, all relationships will have problems and issues, some are workable, others are not.

So if it does not feel right, if it is a continual flow of misery, then stay or go?


I and Me

[Narcissus by Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio]

The man in the picture above represents someone who only thinks of himself, the world goes around him, everyone must turn their attention to him, loving himself more than anyone else, I can go on but you get what I am trying to say.

Is it wrong for someone to think only of themselves, act only for themselves, and put themselves above others? He or she will love you, help you, but only if it draws attention to him or her.

We all need to think of ourselves in a positive way, that we are gifted for something, to a certain extent, if not, then it gives off a feeling of having low self-esteem. But where do we draw the  line in some people over-absorption of who they are in a narcissistic state relating to others? How can we tell if we are or are not like that?

Would you hang around someone who is vain, conceited, egotistical, and every, well almost everything that they do is for a selfish desire?


Have you ever seen The Lord of The Rings movie? At first I didn’t like this movie (I still prefer the book) but I have grown to appreciate it. In the movie are two characters, Aragon and Arwen.

Arwen: Do you remember what I told you?

Aragon: You said you’d bind yourself to me, forsaking the immortal life of your people.

Arwen: And to that I hold. I would rather share one lifetime with you than face all the ages of this world alone.

She gave up living forever to be with the man she loves. How romantic or foolish? Which brings me to the reason I am writing this, is love about sacrifice?

That is from a book, fantasy; although, some have done it. Jesus did it for all humans. ” Therefore doth my Father love me, because I lay down my life, that I might take it again. No man taketh it from me, but I lay it down of myself. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again. . . .” John 10 vs 17 – 18

What are you willing to give up for love?

Only Band-aids

The opening line in A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens goes like this, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”

This is how it is in life, more often than not, one of these times seems to have more control over the other. Sometimes things, events, and people bring about the good and bad in life, which brings me to the reason why I am writing this.

The more I read and listened to news about Africa, the more I am convince that the problem with that continent are its leaders.

There are two types of people, perhaps three if there is a mixture of qualities from trait A and trait B.

Trait A is a Cyndi Lauper song. “But I see your true colors shining through, I see your true colors, and that’s why I love you.” from the song True Colors

Trait B is a Phil Collins song. “I’ve seen your face before my friend, But I don’t know if you know who I am, Well I was there and saw what you did, I saw it with my own two eyes, So you can wipe off that grin, Know where you’ve been, It’s all been a pack of lies.” from the song In The Air Tonight

Africa’s been cut and bleeding for years, and no amount of band-aids are going to solve their wounds. Am I asking for a panacea? Gosh no, but something gatta give.

But some may say, “Sovereignty, Sovereignty.” Is there really an absolute sovereign nation?

A man from the past

One of the most popular New Year’s Day resolution that’s made is the hope of  finding that special someone. The thought of being alone is not only scary and lonely but heartbreaking.

Which brings me to this question:- What kind of love interests do some people look for, or should look for? One that is available? Mr. Right? Or a man from the past? The whole point of writing this is because of the last one.

Pride and Prejudice is one of my favorite novels, and Mr. Darcy, one of my favorite characters. I do not believe that Jane Austen made him up out of thin air; somewhere he must have existed, and I guess some are saying if only he exists today.

Mr. Darcy’s ideal, well my kind of ideal. Take away his money and he will still be an interesting character. A gentleman with his flaws of snobbery and pride. But he was reformed. Love did it. 🙂

Now to the men who portrayed him. Colin Firth did an excellent job, Matthew Macfadyen, not so much. Firth was more believable; he got who the owner of Pemberley was. Macfadyen was flat; although, the version he starred in showed more emotions.

So do the men of today stack up against the men of the past? Should there even be a comparison?